How to Secretarymaxx Your Girl
The Leadership Blueprint That Turns Your Woman Into Your Most Loyal, Invested, and Irreplaceable Ride-Or-Die
Your girl is bored out of her mind and it’s all your fault. She follows orders from her boss five days a week but the man she actually loves won’t give her a single task. Most guys are out here doing everything themselves and wondering why the relationship fizzles out.
And you're probably wondering what one has to do with another. But in just a few minutes you will not only understand the comparison, but you will have also equipped yourself with nearly everything you'd ever need to:
Turn your woman into your very own personal secretary
Build a dopamine-loop reward system that has her completing your tasks like a game she won’t ever want to put down
Get her seamlessly doing all of it without complaints
Watch the bond between you two tighten like nothing else with every task she knocks out
A woman with no assigned role in your life will eventually find a role outside of it; and the best relationship you’ll ever have will be run like a business with her as your most trusted operator.
Picture this. Your girl is on the couch. Three hours deep into TikTok. Eyes glazed. You just got home from handling the groceries, booking the dinner reservation, confirming the flights, scheduling your own dentist appointment, and researching which hotel has the best rooftop pool for your anniversary trip. You did all of this alone. And you’re proud of it because somewhere along the line, some podcast or some father figure or some deeply flawed idea in your head told you that a real man handles everything himself.
Meanwhile she’s watching a girl on her phone explain why she left her boyfriend of four years. And something in your girl’s chest is stirring. All because she has nothing to do. No stake in your life. No mission. No sense that she’s needed for anything beyond existing next to you and looking pretty. And a woman with no purpose inside a relationship is a woman who will eventually find one outside of it.
I’ve watched this play out more times than I can count. Good men. Solid men. Men who love their women with everything they’ve got. And they lose them slowly over time. They didn’t do anything wrong in the traditional sense yet they turned out miserable because they ended up doing everything. They became a one-man operation and turned their girlfriend into a spectator of her own relationship, rather than being a real-time G with a loyal ride-or-die by his side who’d do anything for him to keep him pleased and happy.
This is the mistake that kills more relationships than cheating ever will. Boring sterility. Directionless flow of things. Zero purpose towards a shared goal.
The Good Little Soy-Goy™ Who Does It All
A man who does everything for his woman is not only a soy-provider type but he’s also a shipwreck with a gay hero complex waiting to crash.
You’ve seen this guy. Maybe you are this guy. He plans every date. Picks every restaurant. Books every trip. Handles every bill. Manages every errand. And when his girl offers to help, he waves her off. “Nah babe, I got it.” He says it like he’s being generous. Like he’s taking care of her. A smile, an “okay,” and she goes back to whatever she was doing. Which is nothing. Which is always nothing. If she’s not working or studying, it’s almost always bullshit, and you know it.
Or even worse (and very common for a lot of men, sadly), his good-for-nothing girl doesn’t even offer to help or to run errands or to do any acts of service for her man. Despicable the kinds of relationships men allow…
This soygoy™ thinks the provider role means doing it all. Thinks the more he takes off her plate, the more she’ll love him for it. And for a while she may seem to. Or she might make you think she does. But what’s building underneath is something much uglier than either of them can see or predict.
What’s actually happening is she’s becoming a first-class passenger. And passengers ride until they get bored or until someone offers them the wheel. They have no investment in the car so why would they stay?
You ever had a job where your boss wouldn’t let you handle a single thing? Where every task got micromanaged or done by someone else before you could start? Remember that feeling? You showed up, punched the clock, did the bare minimum, and spent most of your energy thinking about quitting. You didn’t feel valued or remotely needed. You felt like an empty body warming a seat.
That’s what you’re doing to your girl when you handle everything yourself.
When you refuse to turn her into your personal secretary.
Side note, I have always said that the romantic is 100% the man. I stand by it. Yes, the man will be the one to initiate dates and all of that jazz, but there’s a very thick line and most men seem to be on the wrong side of that line when it comes to excessive acts of service/thoughts/energy disposed towards pleasing their woman - which in the long-run kills the love and attraction the woman feels towards her man.
What Is Secretarymaxxing?
No man in history has ever built anything worth a damn completely alone. Not an empire. Not a business. Not a family. And definitely not a relationship.
The concept is simple. Grocery shopping. Appointment scheduling. Amazon lists. Research projects. Making calls. RSVPs. Booking tickets. Finding worthy restaurants. TikTok deep research (yes, that’s a real skill and your girl probably has a PhD in it). You give her tasks. Real ones. Things that matter. Things that contribute to how your life runs together.
And before someone quotes this out of context and has a meltdown on X - and I could not give less of a fuck but - it’s important to clear this up for my loyal readers. I’m talking about partnership, not “slavery” - whatever the fuck that means in relationships... Dumping chores on her while you kick your feet up like some deadbeat 24 hours a day, 7 days a week is the opposite of what this is. You must be a man respectable enough and worthy of having tasks done for you because she must subconsciously feel that it’s a team effort towards a concerted vision (which is a very crucial part of Soulsnatching - and you should read part 1 before part 2 drops in a couple of weeks, if you haven’t already).
And if you don’t have a private, loyal, ride-or-die woman to choose from, the IG Blueprint is perfect guide to finding that exact woman - leagues better than any swipe app. You can click here to read more about it.
Secretarymaxxing is delegation. The same kind of delegation that every CEO, every general, every man who has ever led anything worth leading understands is not optional. The same way Vito Corleone delegates tasks to his family, you will do so with your sons and daughters. The same should and will be done for your worthy woman, right? It is required. You cannot run an empire alone. And your relationship is an empire whether you treat it like one or not.
The same soygoys™ complaining about how toxic this is will go and suck off their bosses for a $3 raise if he offered it. The biggest slaves are the losers who don’t see the importance of secretarymaxxing your devoted woman who’s secretly begging for commands to further contribute to your long-lasting relationship.
When you hand your girl the grocery list and say “handle this for us this week,” you’re letting her subconsciously know that you trust her with this. This is her domain now. Run it. It has nothing to do with you being lazy as you’re already a respectable guy who’s very obviously not a lazy man; your efforts are better spent elsewhere for the total vision of the family.
When you tell her to research the best restaurants for your trip to Miami and she comes back with three options, you’re telling her that her taste, her judgment, and her effort is valuable to you. That she has a role in building this life that goes beyond sitting there looking pretty.
Some guys hear “give your girl tasks” and their stomach drops. They think she’s going to call them controlling. They think feminism has somehow made it illegal to ask your woman to pick up groceries.
Seriously.
Those guys have never seen what happens when a woman who loves you gets handed a mission. Her eyes light up. She takes it and runs. She comes back with not three restaurant options but five, with screenshots, reviews, price comparisons, and a little note that says “I think you’d love this one.” The task gets done and then some. She makes it hers. Because she finally has skin in the game (I’ve seen this happen in every single relationship where the man actually had the balls to try it).
And that changes everything.
She’s Begging You to Lead Yet You Keep Telling Her You’re Gay
You might hear some girls say they want a man who takes care of everything. The same way a kid says they want ice cream for every meal. Sounds good in the fantasy. In reality those same women get bored very quickly.
Wonder where that leads them… (infidelity, openness to exploring new options, etc.)
Also, let’s not pretend girls actually know what they really want. Bullshit gets pedaled on here by girls with a following, talking about what they actually want, and what guys should do for them. Most of the time that shit is smoke and mirrors, fellas. Ignore the fuck out of them, they are literally leading you to a deathtrap. Most women (90+%) have zero genuine idea in what they really want plus what they actually need.
A woman who has nothing to contribute to your shared life will fill that void with something. TikTok. Brunch gossip. Online shopping binges. Emotional affairs with coworkers who make her feel seen. Drama she manufactures because at least conflict gives her something to feel. Human beings need purpose the way they need oxygen. Cut it off and they start gasping for whatever’s closest.
Just like men get depressed and lose their fire when they don’t have something to build toward, women cling to whatever bullshit’s nearest if they don’t feel they have a purpose either. You’ve seen it. Starting a new hobby every two weeks and dropping each one. Rearranging and shopping for the apartment constantly because she needs to feel like she’s doing something. Picking fights over nothing on a random Wednesday night because the silence of having no role in your life is louder than any argument for her.
She’s understimulated. And you did that to her. Because you are the captain of the ship.
The women who thrive in relationships, the ride-or-dies, the ones who defend their man like their life depends on it, the ones who brag about him to their friends and parents with that look in their eyes that makes every other girl in the room jealous, those women all have one thing in common. They feel essential. They feel like if they disappeared tomorrow, a real piece of the operation would collapse. Because it would. Because he trusted her with real responsibility and she rose to meet it every single time.
Become their purpose. Do not be afraid of “toxic” connotations. These LGBT flag in bio types are immense losers whose lives are - of no exaggeration - a cesspool in hell. Lead your relationship like a CEO with a mix of good “bedside manners” and comfort built in.
Your girl should feel like she is a co-architect of this life you have together and she must know it. A Sovereign Architect builds with someone who’s earned the right to hold the blueprint. That’s the whole point of having a woman you trust.
But most guys stop right here…
They get the secretarymaxx concept but they fumble the execution terribly because they never understood the step-by-step psychology underneath it.
Why this works at a level so deep it rewires how she sees you, the relationship, everything.
Most men will have no understanding of how to optimally go about secretarymaxxing their woman in a day-to-day proper fashion that doesn’t butcher the entire relationship.
The man who stumbles into a good dynamic versus the man who builds one with intent and purpose? That gap is far more enormous than you think. And right now, we’re going to eliminate that gap and clear up the path for my loyal readers entirely.
Let’s evolve your relationship and elevate your entire life.
